Writing

I don't like to write. I like having written.

When I'm writing, I usually don't like what shows up on the screen. I'm too close to it. There's the idea of what I want to say, then there's the inner critic that wants to jump in and fix things like grammar, style, and structure. To write well, I have to stifle the critic and be willing to write lots and write badly. The name I have for it is spilling my thoughts onto paper. Editing is for later.

Content is hard to come by. For me, it has to be stream of consciousness, or free writing. I have to be willing to write a lot, a lot of which may get deleted, to see where the writing is going and to see if there is any substance or value in it. I don't like that it works that way, but I've come to terms with it and I still get enough out of it to continue writing. And that surprises me.

Writing is very hard work. But I like reading what I've written. Before I can enjoy reading my own writing, I need to have some distance from it, and that means time. I need to let it go for at least a week. Then I can enjoy it as a reader and not read it form the perspective of an author or editor. I'll still edit it. I need to do that from a reader's perspective. When I'm writing, I know what I want to say and I usually think I've said it well. But I'm too close to it then. I need to lose my familiarity with it so I can see if readers will understand what I was trying to communicate. I know what I meant, but do they?

Once I get it right, I'll read it four or five more times just for the pure enjoyment of reading it. I'll still tinker with words and structure. But I'll know it's finished when I start rewriting things, then rewriting them back the way they were.

When I haven't written for a while, I long for that joy and I write again.